Invasive Procedures Overseas Not Smart

It appears as if I must close out 2011 by warning people against getting invasive procedures overseas. Yesterday breast augmentation, today tattoos. Yes, tattoos are invasive--and if you're planning on getting one overseas because the price is right, reconsider. Australian officials claim that a recent tattoo receiver likely caught HIV from the ink-needle of an artist on the Indonesian resort island of Bali.

Australian health authorities recommended that people who had recently been tattooed on the island, known for its white sandy beaches, partying and nightlife, should consider being tested for HIV and other blood-borne viruses (and I'm personally even more afraid of hepatitis).

"All the evidence points to a tattoo received recently in Bali as being the source of the infection," Western Australia's Department of Health said in a statement dated Friday.

"This case demonstrates the very real health risk in having this type of procedure done overseas," said Paul Armstrong, the department's director of communicable disease control.

No shiitakes! Dang people, what's with the utmost trust in others that makes you think humans are above using dirty tools on you? That's just foolish. Forget the ignorance and differences in standards of many third world countries--but some people just don't care. One reason we take things as simple hygiene for granted in the western world is that we've gone through the pain of experience over the last century to understand the cleanliness/godliness thing. In other words, we've got to be clean by law, and any violation is met with punishment and shutdown. Can we say the same for Bali?

The real answer from me is, "I don't know"...but that's enough for me to keep my procedures home-grown. So if you don't know, these procedures would include:

• plastic surgery
• tattoos
• dental work
• other surgeries
• ear piercings
• other body piercings
• delivering babies
• and darn it...probably sex too (but that's just my peculiarity)

If you feel like the deal you're getting overseas just can't be beat, then, well...just know the risks. I'd pay top dollar, myself, to know I'm getting the best procedures done; but really, I do care and think about my health like that. Hope you do too.

Middle-Aged Dissatisfied with Sex

Do you remember the Summer of Love?  How about "free love," or "make love, not war?"  If you do, you're probably a baby boomer.  And even more likely that your dissatisfied with your current sex life, because that's what a recent poll has shown, today's middle-aged Americans are less satisfied with their sex lives today's middle-aged Americans are less satisfied with their sex lives than any other age group.  Perhaps we should change the slogan to "Make quilts...they're easier."

According to the Associated Press-LifeGoesStrong.com poll, only 7% of Americans aged 45-65 described their sex lives as extremely satisfied.  Nearly 25% of this group said they were dissatisfied with their sex lives, compared to 12% of 18- to 29-year-olds, 20% of those 30-44 and 17% of those over 65.  Pretty tough when your parents are more satisfied with their sex lives in their golden years.

Baby boomers, it seems, may feel like they've tried all there is to try sexually, as nearly three in five women and half of men in this age group said they have done it all.  28% of men between 45 and 65 said they are sexually dissatisfied, while more than two in five said their sex lives got worse in the last decade.  Further, nearly half of male baby boomers said their partners do not want sex often enough, while only 17% of women felt similarly let down.

But saying that, it is men that are plagued by performance problems.  The poll found two in five men between 45 and 65 having problems with sexual functioning, while only 19% of women in the same age group said the same. For both genders, less than half received treatment.

The AP-LifeGoesStrong.com Poll involved online interviews with 945 people between 45 and 65, as well as companion interviews with an additional 587 people aged 18-44 and over 65.  It was conducted using KnowledgePanel, which uses a probability-based design. Respondents to the survey were first selected randomly for KnowledgePanel using phone or mail survey methods and were later interviewed for this survey online.

Well, all I can say is that maybe changing the world has its drawbacks.  Since the boomer generation has been involved in many of the major cultural changes of the modern age, as well as being at the forefront of experimentation of all types (think hippies, sexual revolution, acceptance of premarital sex, abortion legalization, and coming out), perhaps there isn't much else left to the imagination.  I'm sure that the 7% of satisfied middle-agers have kept searching--and finding.  But for a large number, they're a bit spent.

It's never too late however; so don't give up on retaining a satisfying sex life just yet boomers.  A gerbil here, a geisha there...get creative, dang it!  It can only get better...or worse.  It's up to you.  But my guess is that dissatisfaction means it's still somewhat important to you.  It's all in the mind, anyway.  Change that and you're home free.

Ovulating Women Act Like Horny Men (Sort Of)

Everybody knows about PMS, but do women change their behavior during ovulation?  Current research says they do, sexually, and these changes may have evolutionary significance in spreading our genes.

Two new studies in the November issue of the journal Evolution and Human Behavior find that women get a little wilder during their most fertile days of the month.  One study found that ovulating women are more open to the idea of hooking up with a stranger or acquaintance, while the other study found that women with less masculine-looking partners are more likely to lust after men with "masculine" traits--like strong, square jaws--than women with partners already possessing those traits.

In the past, most research on the menstrual cycle focused on premenstrual syndrome (PMS), but these new studies are two of more than twenty focusing on behavioral changes brought about by ovulation.  Researchers in evolutionary biology have taken it for granted that ovulation is of slight significance since humans have deviated from the typical estrus cycle (heat) of mammals, and can be up for sex anytime of the month.

This, however, is just a theory, and a wrong one at that.  For instance, men can tell when a woman is ovulating, although they do so imperfectly.  Some experts believe it's through smell--of pheromones, excreted chemicals that triggers a social response in members of the same species--but this is just a hypothesis.  Several studies, however, have found that women report that their men become more attentive and jealous around fertile days. One study, in fact, found that when women were fertile, their male partners saw other men as a greater threat.

Further, women do have a sort-of "heat" phase, yet instead of simply being more receptive to sex, they want it for different reasons.  Consider this phase a lust-cycle, where women want sex for sex's sake and not for intimacy, which might be more the reason outside of the cycle.

The second study of the pair looked at womens' phenotypic preference for masculine traits during fertile periods.  Several previous studies had found that, when ovulating, women tended to go for more masculine-looking men.  Masculine traits fertile women prefer are strong-jawed faces, muscular bodies, dominant behaviors, deep voices and tallness.

(Example of test picture to the left--women, which face do you prefer?)

In the latest study, researchers found that if a woman is partnered with a man without a masculine face, her eye is more likely to wander during her fertile days. Now this doesn't mean she'll necessarily act on her wandering eye, but she'll likely look nonetheless.  And other studies have shown that the hormonal fluctuations surrounding ovulation do change women's attitudes and behavior.  For instance, fertile women seem to be more open than non-fertile women to the idea of taking "sexual pleasures where [they] find them."  According to the authors of the study, women in ovulation are more likely to express interest in sleeping with an attractive stranger or someone they don't care about.  Just sex.

Women in ovulation also tried harder to look nice for pictures, according to a 2006 study, showing that the hormonal changes may also affect female decision making.  An online shopping experiment reveals fertile women are also more likely to choose sexy clothes and accessories than women who weren't fertile, according to the study published online in the Journal of Consumer Research in August.  Finally, in a widely publicized study published in Evolution and Human Behavior in 2007, researchers found that ovulating strippers made an average of $30 more an hour than menstruating strippers and $15 more an hour than non-ovulating, non-menstruating strippers.

So to conclude, during fertile periods, women tend to be a bit friskier, make decisions about their attractiveness, look harder at masculine features, and be more likely to engage in casual sex.  Why?  To ensure the likelihood of fertilization and to increase the probability of finding successful genes, biologically speaking that is.  I don't know about you, but it sounds to me like the human female is as much a product of her biology as a man is.  Cool, huh?

Sex and the Law of Conservation.

It's been a while since I touched on the subject, but a new survey shows that people over 45 are having less SEX, and feeling less satisfied than they were ten years ago. They also happen to be more open to sex outside of marriage...hmmmm.

The survey conducted by the AARP was completed by 1,670 Americans, 45 years and older. The results were compared to the same survey given in 1999 and 2004. Ten years ago 41% of respondents said non-marital sex was wrong, while only 22% said so on the new survey.

Despite this openness among the middle aged and elderly, as a whole, their sexual activity has decreased by 10% since 2004. Further, five years ago 51% of this set responded that they were satisfied with their sex lives; however, only 43% said so on the new survey.

As an interesting twist, unmarried people in relationships had sex more frequently and with more satisfaction than respondents who were married. According to the AARP's sex and relationship expert, sociologist Pepper Schwartz, "Long-term married couples may get a little less interested. Older people in non-married relations work harder at it and enjoy it more."

As far as gender differences go, no surprises here: Men think about sex and engage it more often than women, and are about twice as likely as women (21 percent versus 11 percent) to admit to sexual activity outside their primary relationship. Men are more than five times as likely as women to say they think of sex at least once a day, and nearly three times as likely to say they engage in self-stimulation at least once a week. But unfortunately, only 12 percent of the survey's sexually active single males reported using condoms. Tsk, tsk geezers--no glove, no love applies to you, too. The clap shows no age preference. So now you know.

Finally, when asked what would improve their sex lives:

• 20% of the women and 37% of the men said better health
• 14% of the women and 26% of the men said better personal finances.

Ah, always the struggle between cash and capability.

I find these survey results very interesting, and we can speculate in every kind of direction as to what is causing the trend. For instance, Ms. Schwartz, the sociologist evaluating the survey believes that the decrease in sexual activity is due to the recent economic downturn. And judging by the small number of responses to the affirmative (mentioned above), one could make that connection. But perhaps there is more.

Maybe the growth of the internet, and the availability of sexually explicit material make it easier for people (men, mostly) to have their urges and desires satisfied. Since I know from the first law of thermodynamics (conservation of energy) that nothing is ever really missing, then sexual energy must also be conserved. Hmmm...people over 45 aren't having sex with each other, then where are they having sex? Further, with privacy being factored into the equation, it would make sense that men (the gender increasingly more satisfied with their sex lives, compared to women according to Dr. Stacy Tessler Lindau, professor of medicine at the University of Chicago), more than ever before, can engage in sexual activity (albeit with their computers) without the possibility of embarrassment. And according to experts, men are not the only ones consuming online porn. Women also consume pornography, although they increasingly prefer written material.

Increased use of online pornography could be at least one factor accounting for this survey's findings...including the increased liberalism toward non-marital sex. Nothing wrong with that, just a transformation of where and how people are experiencing sex, if my thoughts are correct, that is. If I am right, then we can all rest securely knowing that we are operating within universal laws of conservation. Now that's something to be satisfied with.

Condom Couture

How'd that condom fit? Many men are complaining, "not too well"...and they're taking them off or shunning them altogether as a result. Hope Trojan Brand is listening.

According to a recent survey of 436 men, aged 18 to 67, 45 percent said they'd used a condom that fit poorly the last time they had sex during the previous three months. Doh! And these men were 2.5 times more likely to say their condom broke or slipped compared to those who said their condoms fit well; they were also five times more likely to say they experienced irritation to the penis.

Men who said that condoms fit poorly also complained that the condoms made it difficult for them or their partners to reach orgasm, and they were more likely to remove the condoms and continue having sex without. Double doh!

The study was conducted by The Kinsey Institute for Research in Sex, Gender and Reproduction, on their website, and is published online in February in the journal Sexually Transmitted Infections. Researchers noted that the findings "emphasize the point that men and their female sex partners may benefit from public health efforts designed to promote the improved fit of condoms."

I see it now, a whole new industry on the horizon: condom haute couture--customized rubbers. Now that's an idea. They can come in all kinds if fabulous colors and varieties: french ticklers, vibratory stimulators, crab claws, whatever. But if this survey is a good representation of the public, then it would behoove condom companies to listen, as increases in unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases can result from defunct rubbers.

My advice to men is to actually take the time to search for the right condom. Although the local drugstore usually carries the minimum of brands and varieties, specialty stores will have wider selections. Or better yet, here's a website: www.condomania.com. They've got the right glove for every size. Check it out. Taking the time to do it right is important. Put a little work in, fellas...or suffer the consequences.

German Pop-Star Charged with Reckless Sex

Oh lord, Nadja Benaissa...you know her, right? Oh you don't? I never heard of her either, before today. But you'll here her name now, because she's in BIG trouble. The pop singer from the German all-girl band, No Angels, was charged with causing bodily harm for failing to inform sexual partners that she was HIV positive. Doh! No angel, indeed.

Ms. Benaissa, 27, had sex on five occasions between 2000 and 2004 with three people and did not tell them she was infected, even though she had known since 1999, according to the charge sheet.

"She was well aware that any unprotected sexual contact can lead to the virus being passed on," prosecutors in the German town of Darmstadt near Frankfurt said.

One of the three former partners has been confirmed as being infected with the HIV virus. Hmm...would knowing her status have changed things? Would the former partners have declined? I don't know, have you seen what see looks like? Man, that's dangerous.

Either way, if you are infected with HIV, herpes simplex, gonorrhea, syphilis, chlamydia, or any other sexually transmittable disease...own up to it. Don't mess with other peoples' lives like that. It's irresponsible and quite frankly, heinous, and one way or another it'll come back to you. For the smokin' hot Benaissa, well, you're gonna have to pay, babe.

Sexually Satified Women Have Greater Well-Being

Think sex isn't health? Think again. New research suggests that sexually satisfied women have greater well-being. On the flip side, sexually dissatisfied women had lower well-being and lower vitality. You don't say...hmmm. Tell me more.

Australian researchers at the Women's Health Program at Monash University studied 295 women, aged 20 to 65, who were sexually active more than twice a month. They wanted to explore the links between sexual satisfaction and well-being in women, and if there was any difference between pre- and postmenopausal women. According to Dr. Sonia Davison, one of the scientist on the study, "This finding highlights the importance of addressing these areas as an essential part of women's health care, because women may be uncomfortable discussing these issues with their doctor." She went on to say,

"It is impossible to determine if dissatisfied women had lower well-being because they were sexually dissatisfied, or if the reverse is true, such that women who started with lower well-being tended to secondarily have sexual dissatisfaction. As such, pharmacotherapies aimed to treat sexual dysfunction may have secondary effects on well-being, and the reverse may be true."

More than 90 percent of the women in the study said their sexual activity involved a partner, and that sexual activity was initiated by the partner at least 50 percent of the time. This means that the sexual activity of the study participants may have been affected by partner presence/absence, partner health and sexual function--factors that weren't addressed in the study, the researchers noted.

Well, really, no surprises here: Sexuality is a part of being human; we are sexual beings. Healthy sexual contact is necessary in the way all human touch is. A person deprived of touch can become isolated, ill or whither away and die (study done on children in orphanages). So go figure that sexually satisfied women have greater well-being.

All I can say is that if you, woman or man, are repressing your sexuality for any reason other than having no interest, you'd better rethink your philosophy there. I know, I know, living in a puritanical society makes it tough on everyone, but try to figure it out anyway. I mean, it is for wellness' sake, isn't it?

Sexual Endurance Not What We Thought

Who was it that said they don't want no one minute-man? Well then how about a three-minute man? Five-minute dynamo? If current research is right, then there should be a lot of smug studs out there relishing the notion that 15 minutes of love making is a damn near marathon.

According to experts, the optimal amount of time for sexual intercourse is 3 to 13 minutes. Woohoo boys, no more need for explaining, everybody's doing the Flashdance. That's right, a survey of sex therapists showed that the average coital time between couples is a lot shorter than we all think. In fact, 7.3 minutes is the median time for sexual intercourse (found in a study of 1,500 people where the women held stopwatches).

The results were not gender specific--both women and men want foreplay and sexual intercourse to last longer--and they were not age specific, as both older and younger men had difficulty making sex last much longer. I know, I know, we've all seen the movies, but they're loopin' film, I tell ya. But for anyone who has suffered more than just a little anxiety over this matter, you can finally put it to rest, not many people are doing much more that. According to Marianne Brandon, a clinical psychologist and director of Wellminds Wellbodies in Annapolis, Md., "There are so many myths in our culture of what other people are doing sexually. Most people's sex lives are not as exciting as other people think they are."

Amen, sister. Look, it's just about mutual fulfillment. 5 minutes, 10 minutes, 13.3 minutes, if that's what it takes, then that what it takes. Sometimes one partner is into it and the other one isn't--2 minutes. Or God forbid, 30 minutes! Oh well, you're just not in sync, try again another time. Or even better, wait till you're both down with it. Or...you can talk about it and learn each other's parameters (not advisable, however, on a first date). Either way, chill out about your staying power, it's really not that big of a deal.

The best part of this story is a comment by lead author Eric Corty who said, "People who read this will say, 'I last five minutes or my partner lasts 8 minutes,' and say, 'That's OK.' They will relax a little bit." All I can say is my wife better not be having any of those discussions with anybody. And if any of you feel the need to tell me, well...I'm not interested.